When I was in college my older sister had two children. Both of us had dark rings under our eyes, hers due to the responsibilities of being a new mom and mine from studying and partying. In spite of our different situations, she said to me, "I am so happy the college phase of my life is over". Although I didn't respond I decided she was talking nonsense because of sleep deprivation. More than a decade later I get what she meant.
Although it must be different for each mother, things started to click for me when I felt my firstborn's kick inside. From that moment on I was a mother and the baby was foremost in my mind. By the time she was born I had a head start on my husband, months of putting someone else before me, many weeks of private companionship, days of synchronizing sleep routines, minutes of constant touching and infinite seconds of creating a bond strong enough to last a lifetime. On August 31st 2010, when Michelle was born, I was already a mom, fully prepared to take care of her while my husband got acclimated to the idea of being a father.
Giving birth, for me, was an amazing experience that showed me the true potential of my own body. Even with very narrow hips, I gave birth to an eight pound baby after an hour and a haft of active labor (with an epidural, of course!), no c-section. This experience reconfirmed in my mind the awesome potential of a woman's body and since then, I haven't been able to shake the idea that parents develop special powers. I say parents, and not just mothers, because I have seen my husband do incredible, almost magical things, since our kids were born. Fortunately, our powers differ and even complement each other, which is why we make a great team. I am functional without sleep, he knows by memory the dosage of every medicine for each child. I know when a tantrum can be quenched by a time out or a hug, he knows when they are ready to be potty trained. My experience as a new mom has been infinitely enriched by watching him grow into an awesome dad. I find him smarter, sexier, funnier now than he has ever been. What I didn't expect is for motherhood to be this challenging and fun. I am reading and learning more now than I did in college. I am also laughing, celebrating, singing, dancing and playing more than ever before. Just like any experience in life, you get what you put in. But for me, the magic of parenthood is that we get to make the rules, that the amount of laughter, hugs and kisses depends on us, that the variety of activities, importance of family time, the presence of manners are determined by our actions and words. It is a world I get to create with my husband for the most important people in our lives... our kids.
